You know you want to move forwards but something is stopping you. A block in your life that you are struggling to get around. A lot of people in this position do actually know what needs to be done. It's doing it that's the problem.
The approach you take in solving a problem in your life can be a big factor in whether you are ultimately likely to succeed, especially if you're not necessarily at your best.
No matter what the issue is, if you have identified that it is lowering your satisfaction with life and causing unhappiness, it will instantly take on a greater magnitude. Your future depends on solving it and this brings pressure. When you feel under pressure you don't necessarily think the most rationally. Some people feel they thrive under pressure but when your entire life and happiness is at stake then the pressure is different. Someone that can make huge business decisions that involve millions of pounds, in a split second, can't necessarily transfer that ability to make the right decision when it comes to life choices.
Think about this statement.
"My life is terrible. I hate my job, I'm bored, my relationship is suffering and I have depression. I can't take much more."
It's clear that something has to change quite drastically. In fact, there may be some obvious suggestions.
Change your job
Get out more
Talk to your partner
Go and see your Doctor
There you go - fixed.
Putting aside the fact these suggestions are ridiculously simplistic, even if the person in question admitted that doing those things would definitely help, where do they start?
And if it were that simple, surely the person would have done them by now?
It's like saying "It's easy. Just change everything in your life. Oh, and by the way, stop being depressed while you're at it."
I agree that if the person could do those things, it would probably help them, but it is a mammoth undertaking.
So, they know that something has to be done but it feels to big to do.
This is where 'baby steps' can help.
To be presented with the challenge of changing your entire life and everything in it, is crazy. It is high likely that you may not succeed with some of your efforts and if you are not feeling your best, those setbacks could easily discourage you from trying anything further. You could then give up entirely, which mean you can add 'sense of failure' to the list of things wrong in your life.
So how about changing the approach? How about fulfilling a series of small but eminently achievable goals that gradually build into a bigger achievement.
On the subject of 'being bored' pick something you know that you will enjoy doing that would not be boring. Not only that, pick something that you know you can do. All that remains is for you to do it. It may be something simple like meeting a friend for a coffee. It may only last for an hour of the week. But consider this...
For that hour you were not bored.
You identified something you would enjoy and you made it happen.
You made the effort to arrange it and attend.
It introduced a small amount of variety into your life that was previously missing.
Very small gains but extremely important.
You showed you have the ability to know what is important to you.
You were able to put your needs first, knowing that you would feel better for it.
You had to make the whole thing happen, which means you can be pleased with yourself for doing it.
You had a plan and you carried it out.
This 'baby step' of meeting a friend has a very important effect on you that cannot be underestimated.
It was a positive event in the midst of a life that previously felt hopeless. It was like a tiny victory.
This alone will not change your life around, but when you are embarking on the epic journey to change your life, there has to be a first step somewhere. It has to be a step forward that will not fail and feel like two steps backwards. If you look at that hour spent doing what you wanted to do as a small move forwards it could give you that little bit of belief that you could do it again. That you could think of some other small victory that you could achieve.
After a short while you are going to look back at what you have been doing and there will be a build up of evidence supporting the idea that you can change things around.
All of these positive pieces of your life adding up and instilling a sense of accomplishment in you. Your mindset will begin to change. Hopelesness starts to morph into hopefulness. The idea that nothing ever changes has to be questioned, because you are doing things differently, therefor things are changing.
And the best part is that YOU are doing it. You are back in control of your life.
It's still a long road but those baby steps soon start to turn into confident strides.
