Couples Counselling - It's not about assigning blame.

Some people have some very strong opinions about couples counselling. Not surprisingly, some of the strongest opinions tend to come from those that have never experienced it but choose to make bold assumptions.


So let's try to explain how it works.....


Call it whatever you like, Marriage Counselling, Couples Counselling, Relationship Counselling, it's not about finding out who's at fault and then dishing out blame.


Think, for a moment, about an individual going to Counselling for their own personal therapy. Something in their life is going on and they cannot work out how to deal with it. They want to examine their situation, find possible reasons why it's happening and then, hopefully, identify solutions that will improve how they feel.


The same thing happens with couples counselling except that the 'individual' that is going to counselling is 'the relationship'.


It's the relationship that has something going on that is causing problems. The relationship wants to improve and needs to find ways of doing so. Unfortunately, the relationship cannot speak up for itself.


Therefore, the counsellor, in order to find out the problems affecting the relationship, needs to hear the information from the two people involved.


The relationship can be badly affected by things like bad communication or lack of mutual understanding.


Couples Counselling sessions give each party the chance to express how they feel about themselves, the other person and the relationship. It is an opportunity for each person to hear what the other has going on and how they view things.


Finally, when all is said and done, the aim is not to see who should take the most blame for the relationship problems. It is to come to an agreement and understanding of what each person could do in order for the relationship to flourish.


As long as both parties are committed, Marriage/Couples/Relationship Counselling can be extremely effective.


To read more about Couples Counselling, click here to visit my website




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